Funny Articles

Lots of times you'll see people who don't understand the Navy at all decide to write about naval matters, and hilarity frequently ensues. After being wrong in 2006 and 2007, Dave Lindorff is once again predicting a U.S. attack on Iran -- but this time, it'll come from "aircraft carriers packed with tomahawk cruise missiles"! Maybe next he'll do an investigative piece where he'll learn that aircraft carriers don't carry Tomahawks.

The same people at WorldNetDaily who brought us the "Israeli submarines off Iran" story are now reporting that a Chinese freighter trying to deliver arms to Zimbabwe is being shadowed by a "British Trident submarine"... this despite the fact that Trident is the name of their missile program, and the submarines that carry them are Vanguard-class subs, and that it's really not very likely that the Brits would have a boomer doing shadowing ops off the African coast.

A much better, but still amusing, article comes from a recent media availability inflicted on USS Pittsburgh (SSN 720) in conjunction with Fleet Week in PEV. This article is actually pretty good as far as accuracy goes, and has a good slideshow that's worth a look, but I think that because the writer is a woman, she felt the need to get into the emotional side of submarining:
But as much as the men boast about the fulfillment of being submariners, their jobs can be intricate, lonely and introspective, and above all else, quiet; evident by the signs posted along the hallways: "Practice Sound Silencing, Shut Door Quietly." Every movement or conversation can disturb a crew mate in the tight spaces.
When he's not inside the dark sonar room overseeing four seamen, Sonar Technician 1st class Harris Behrman spends his time reading messages from his wife. She writes about three to four messages each day, mostly updating him about their kids."That's the hardest part, not being with my family," Behrman said. "The first thing I do when I get off board is call my wife."
Fritz, the chief chef, shares a similar longing for his family. In the crew's mess Sunday night, before starting a late night game of poker, the 30-year-old popped opened his laptop in search of pictures of his three children. Hundreds popped up.
"I don't look at them often," he admitted. "I get too nostalgic."
Are these guys catching crap from their buddies right now or what? And why is it that women seem to feel the need to believe that guys actually have complex "feelings"? Dave Barry says it best -- if you see a guy is sitting in his chair, looking pensive, it's not because he's thinking about his relationships; he's most likely trying to remember some obscure sports factoid.